🗣️ Helping Your Child Grow Through Language
How WHPS Builds Independence With Our Words—And How You Can Too
At WHPS, we use a thoughtful approach to how we speak with children—one that helps them grow into confident, capable thinkers. You might hear your child’s teacher say things like:
🟡 “What’s your next step?”
🟡 “How can you set yourself up for success?”
🟡 “Think about what else you might need before you head outside.”
These aren’t just kind phrases. They’re part of a consistent approach we use throughout the day to help students build independence, take ownership of their learning, and develop strong habits for thinking and problem-solving.
We focus on three key types of language: reinforcing, reminding, and redirecting. This approach helps children grow socially and emotionally—not just academically—and it’s something that can be incredibly powerful at home too.
Below are some practical tips—and a few subtle shifts—that can take a little time and practice to get used to, but make a big difference over time.
✅ Reinforcing Language
What it is: Naming what your child is doing well—specifically—so they know exactly what to keep doing.
At school:
🟡 “You remembered to change the ‘y’ to ‘i’ when adding ‘ed.’ That shows you’re thinking about spelling rules.”
At home:
🟡 “You packed your backpack without reminders. That shows you're using the routine we talked about.”
🟡 “You kept working on your drawing even when the first try didn’t go how you wanted. That’s real persistence.”
Why it matters:
Children learn more when we notice and name their own strategies and progress—not just when we say we’re proud. When we tie feedback to clear expectations (“That shows responsibility,” “That’s the routine we practiced”), children begin to see their actions as part of their own growth.
Try to avoid turning reinforcing language into personal approval:
✖ “Thank you for packing your backpack.”
✔ “You packed your backpack. That shows you’re thinking ahead.”
✨ Otherwise, kids may learn to act for approval instead of building internal motivation and pride in their effort.
🔁 Reminding Language
What it is: Giving a short, neutral prompt before things go off track—so your child can self-correct.
At school:
🟡 “What helps you stay focused during writing time?”
At home:
🟡 “Think about what else you might need before we head out the door.”
🟡 “What helps you stay on track when you’re working on your reading?”
Why it matters:
Reminders build your child’s internal voice. Instead of telling them exactly what to do, you’re prompting them to reflect and plan—key skills in executive functioning. When reminders are used early—before frustration builds—they’re more likely to be received calmly and acted on thoughtfully.
✨ These prompts don’t require a reply. They simply invite your child to pause and think, strengthening the habit of self-direction.
✨ Leaving off the last part of the sentence—“Don’t forget your…”—can be a powerful brain-builder. It gives your child a chance to practice thinking ahead.
🔄 Redirecting Language
What it is: Giving a clear, calm direction when your child is off track, unsafe, or unable to regroup on their own.
At school:
🟡 “Freeze. Everyone return to your seat so we can move on.”
At home:
🟡 “Close the game and come sit at the table. It’s time to start dinner.”
🟡 “That was an unkind tone. Try again using a calm voice so we can work it out.”
Why it matters:
When kids are off track, redirecting helps them reset without shame. It focuses on what to do next, not what they did wrong. Clear, neutral directions give children a way forward and teach them how to recover from mistakes.
✨ Use a calm tone, specific direction, and avoid phrasing as a question (e.g., “Can you…?”). Clarity helps kids act, not debate.
💬 Why This Matters
The way we speak to children shapes how they learn to speak to themselves. At WHPS, we don’t just use language to manage behavior—we use it to build skills for life:
✅ Reinforcing: Builds confidence and helps children reflect on what works.
🔁 Reminding: Promotes independence, focus, and follow-through.
🔄 Redirecting: Teaches respectful recovery and emotional regulation.
When home and school use the same approach, it deepens the learning. Let us know if you try any of these at home—we’d love to hear what’s working!